Happy 11 months to Ming Yi and I! I can't wait for him to be out man! Baby I don't know what you've heard about me inside but I want you to know that I love you.....

I fell sick yesterday and until now I am still not feeling okay. I feel like going out but....I don't know..Guess I am not being/thinking rational. Cold-tired-giddy-lonely-feverish-sad. I wish baby was here to take care of me, I just realise that when I will myself not to think of him time would pass much faster. He is left with 25 days while I am left with 6 days. Ah. The thought of it really... makes me smile.

Its been years since I posted, things are getting really crazy.

What's with girls going around thinking that piercings are really cool and stuff.

I've totally been rotting at home the whole day and I have came to a conclusion.

If I do not have plans for today, i'll just go out alone. I don't need to stay at home feeling a little dejected that no one asked me out. I'm just going to write whatever comes to my mind as.....NO FREAKING WAY IS ANYBODY GOING TO READ WHAT I'VE WRITTEN. Good job Tabby.

I am going to enjoy my days outside, though I know that it wouldn't be much fun. But I am still going to go ahead with heading down to town alone. Cause that is Tabby and that is the way I am.

Heyho heyho to my precious Baby!
Yeah, I'll post our pictures when we both discharge okay. I don't want to get into trouble again because of such things, its so stupid. Grrr. Baby..I miss you (:
At panjang's mac now studying with yanting and one of her friends, wow.
I can't believe i'm like doing that! :D Quite proud of myself eh.
Baby, remember our plan yeah. The first week you're coming out we'll go to the beach, then we'll go to the zoo and then shopping! hahas, Its been about more then a month since i've been really able to be together with you. Quickly come out alrights, its good that you're making an effort to be good. I'll tell you anything thats bothering me, don't worry. Wouldn't keep it from you yeah, and i'll do my best to love you!

Baby,i won't compare you with others girls,i won't look down on you and i just loved you for who you are.

I want to takecare of you too,i want to be the one to make you smiles too, but sometimes i just failed to do it. I'm sorry. i just feel so bad baby. I know you changes mood often,but why? is it because of me?.. though sometimes i'm stress about where to take you to,but as long as you're with me,i happy le.

Baby,I'll not give up on you, nothing's gonna change my love for you.

I will not leave you alone to suffer,when you're upset or down.I'd rather have bad times with you,than good times with someone else.i'd rather be beside you in a storm,than safe and warm by myself,i'd rather have hard times together,than to have it easy apart. remember this?

I want to lend you my shoulder,when you cry(but i don't wish to see that happening) but why would you cry because of me? it hurts to see you cry you know..i want to be the one to make you smiles always. I want to be there for you,hugging you tightly with my arms,telling you that everything is fine when you needs me.

I would also like to share things with you if there is anything that bothers me. but you must too. I'll be honest to you,and i hope you will too. I belive you, i trust you. Sometimes don't because of
the things i've said makes you think that i don't believe or trust you.

I won't be thinking that you're asking too much from me, because i'll not think that way. just tell me if you've anything to say. I promise to love you no matter what.

i miss you~

Hahas! Baby, you're damn sure your not gonna make me regret waiting for you yeah!!!! :D

I just Love your assurances man! Thank you and I hope that its true alrights.

(Glad that my baby knows that it indeed is so difficult without him) hee..I miss you so much too baby, don't apologise its okay. I'll wait for you to come out,

and I'll take your promise to heart okay!

I love you, Hope that everything'll be fine, sweetest thing (:

I hope that you won't compare me to girls who may have brighter smiles.

I hope that you will make me smile, take care of me if I get sick, and be trustworthy.

I hope that you will remember that my mood changes all the time.

Please know that when I am sad or down, I want you to coax me. I would not push you away.

I'm sure that you'll be the one to make me laugh.

Please know that when we have plans to go out together, don't stress about where to take me, as what is important is that I'll be with you.

If I cry, please know it isn't because of you, just hold me close, and I'll heal quickly.
And, if it is because of you, I'll heal just the same.

Please tell me If anything bothers you, or If something just doesn't seem right. I would like you to be honest with me. And again, If I have a bad day, I hope you will shower me with confidence and smiles.

I hope that you won't think that I'm asking for too much of you. I hope you understand that I'm a bit nervous.

Every relationship is a new game of cards, and...well I've never been good at cards.

But I will try my best to be kind and love you dearly for all that you are, without expecting too much from you. Thank you for listening, this is all I ask for.

Baby, you trusted me, let me grow and listened to what I had to say without judgement-whether it was something you wanted to hear or not.

Thank you, I love you.

hehes,tabby's xiaoming is here to help her blog! i'll say hello to my baby,when she sees tis. hmmm, i miss you alot!! it have been quiite a long time since i get to be with you le. stupid issues in Gh,getting myself confined inside agaain and again.. sorry. you waited for me whenever i get cut always,i understand its difficult without me (; but,i promise you,you will not regret waiting and being together with me. duibuqi..still don't know when i'll be coming out.
b*by,Thanks for the every single thing you've done for me baby. i promise you i will change =P

You're my sunshine,being together with you really brighten up my days (:

Met Nic, Girlfriend and their school-mates on saturday before church. They really are a fun bunch of people, (:

I can't wait to see you, to be with you. I miss you so. Baby.

I'm sick and I can't help but feel sorry for myself. Pathetic right. Guess I'm pms-ing.

I want longer homeleave, the more I'm outside, I'm able to get in touch with my former self and that assures me alot.

Argh~ My head hurts, and I'm feeling really tired. Would be going back to gh in a few hours when daddy's back home. Its going to be real lonely as Yanting's on extended and Ta's going for her study-leave in a months time. But at least I've got Hm, Pat, Th?

Should be having YOG next week. Wonder what its like.

Am I so inferior when i'm with you? Sometimes i just want to know why. But no matter what you'll still be important to me.

Babyluv, you're inside the t.o.r once again. I miss you, thinking of what you're doing and how you're feeling.

I'll be meeting Nic and girlfriend at cine, have to be at church at 5. Hope I'll reach in time.

My arms feel so sore, thanks to Creston and our dumb plan.

So hilarious. Think I totally embarrassed myself.

I have got so many things on my mind right now, I just want to be happy for a moment without worries. But life is like that, It doesn't go the way I want it to go. Thats why I'll just have to learn to live with it.

Stomach cramp~

My gienpeng picture, at cine(:



Hello Hello to those who are reading. Schools starting tomorrow and i'll have to sleep real early, if not i wouldn't be able to wake up in time. Going to attend school from home, yeah! GRADUATION! hahas, can't wait for even longer homeleave. But anyway, its meaningless if baby isn't coming out. His really getting into alot of trouble nowadays. Fresh case. I really hope that things would be settled soon and that the police would not charge him. But I'm really elated that he accepted Christ, I'm so proud of him being able to do that. He promised to change, asked me to give him time. Do hope that he'll do his best not to get into trouble anymore. Its so worrying.
Baby, if you're reading this now, I just want to say that I have got trust in you, don't disappoint your parents, the people who are concern and have been praying for you. Including me. Alrights? Do your best, ok? I love you, and I'll be here to support you. No matter what happens. (:

Went to Muthu's chalet today, kio his food! Hahas So not bad eh. His only 16 this year, can you believe it. Its good that I went as I have not seen him for a super long time.

I'm going to be positive, I'm going to be Happy-tabby once again.

Baby's inside t.o.r now and wouldn't be able to attend the camp later. I'll be waiting for him, I miss him.

Yanting's sick, hope she gets well soon. If she's going to the doctor I'll be accompanying her.

Tired, sleeping soon. Nights then.

12 days to our 6th month, Baby your all I want.

Just a kiss would do~

Its really been such a long time since I've posted something, was bored so I just decided to update without people knowing. Its nice to know that some people would really take the time to read my blog and best of all, the way I feel. Appreciative eh, but I don't want to get into trouble for expressing myself. It'll just be meaningless for me to continue writing. As for now I just feel like telling the "WHOLE WORLD" that I'm going to be bored to death. Sad Tabby, Sad Mezxzx~ Oh my, guess I'm really going to go bonkers? Its late but I can't seem to fall asleep, I feel like such a paranoid bitch. Sometimes I just want to tell you that I do not like you, but in another way I'll just keep turning soft hearted, repeatedly. I have to emphasize the word, weak. That is totally what I am. I wasn't who I was last time. Now I've not only been degrading myself, I even excepted the fact that I'm as bad as those people whom I despised. I want to be myself again. I want to be me, but I can't seem to get back the usual me. I want to know what I am going to do later on in life, I want to be looked up to in modern society, I want to be successful. Lastly I want to Love and be Loved. I don't want to live in a place where I would always be broken down by worries. I want to live a carefree life.

This is all Tabitha wants, and this is what i hope to achieve.

You know what I mean, you know how I feel. Lmy, I love you.

supposedly was supposed to say....

HAPPY 3RD MONTH TO XIAOMING AND I~

But it was meaningless without him!

Never mind, we still do have alot of time.

I luvvvvvvvvvvvv you, lmy (:

Garnell Creston Ryan;

I'm so sorry if I didn't really get what you were trying to imply about G, but sometimes I feel that its weird how you react towards her or to anything that concerns about her. My point is that if she dosen't reciprocate your feelings then why get so moodless over her. You yourself know that I don't like seeing you that way, you're my bestfriend and somehow I cannot do anything about it. Don't always bring yourself down over her, you may not know that after all, she may not be worth it. But I guess, to you, she's really that important and thats why you don't really hear me crapping much about her anymore. I support your decision in you wanting her, but if its gonna bring you down then i'm going to have to interfere.

Isn't that what friends are for?~

Hello! Happy Tabby is here! Guess what, LMY is right beside me while i'm blogging! :D so freakinggggg glad that he came out this weekend. We went to Iluma to catch " How to teach a dragon " hahahs, xiaoming was pratically falling asleep! Lol. At least he still accompanied me to watch the show, though he was bored. Plus yanting, her meimei and elwin were there with us too! Happy day even though it was a little boring. Met th, lt, D, V and M there. Walked a lil and then we went off to find xiaoming's baby, which is my dearest! lalalala. Too hyper today as his out (: Slacked awhile at jurong and then bus-ed home. Then met moon and another girl at the same place. Talk talk and then we all went Home. Was real tired but sinced his just beside me now I am not thinkingof sleeping until his gone! :D

Lmy, i miss you so much. You aren't talkng but having you by my side now is totally worth all the waiting~ i love you! Sweetest thing ever.

Went to Sentosa today, only ta, girl, pussy and black person came down, plus me. Had fun. ( photos in my facebook.

Bingfu.

You are such an asshole! I do really hope that you'll be able to read this okay! Stalking my blog, damn. You are such a physcotic. Go and DIEEEEE~ suay i saw you today, pinky boy (: Luckily i don't have your picture if not you're dead! Seeya at clementi man!

xiaoming~

Home leave sucks without you. Nothing I say would express the way I feel right now. Just hope that you'll be able to come out next week. I miss you, xiaoming. I really do..so much. I'll still keep waiting. Love you!

LIM MING YI~

You'll be coming out tomorrow at 9am, I just can't wait. Its been exactly 1 whole month since i've really met you. Have absolutely no idea how I could tolerate not seeing you. But at least I managed! (: Proud that I was able too, I miss you super dupeer much man! A few more hours to see you. yay :D

Ham's inside Changi remand, his court date is on this Wednesday. Hope that he'll be able to get tagging. Hmm, nothing much to say just that i'm really excited and i can't get to sleep! HAHA!

ciao~

I was able to go home straight away after school at 12.30pm, so I decided to meet Xiaoming and Yanting outside my school. I was elated to see xiaoming after a really long week, then around 3plus walked him back to gh. Yt and i went down to amk hub to meet her mummy to make her ez-link card. Papa came down and her brought me to Plaza S to catch a movie. It was damn sucky. Reached home at 9.45 then went to bathe and got ready to go out to meet cutie. Waited for him for an hour! can you believe it! Wth, got so pissed with him. Hmmph. Accompanied him to Teban to get his bike parts, then went down to west coast for awhile to lepak and then, HOME (: Yt's going to get cut the next 4 weeks, break curfew. Gosh. Gonna miss her much man.

Nothing much to say~

5th of march. Friday

Woke up around 11am. The plan today was to go down to vivo to catch " Alice in the wonderland ". Met ta at queens town to have lunch, dearest came down to meet us. Bus-ed down to vivo, met Creston, Byron, Megan, John Lim, Chester and Hafiz. Crapped around and took pictures. 2 of Ta's friend ( have no idea how to spell their names ) came down riding their bicycle. They seem to be real friendly. Around 7.30pm met cutie and Helene at Clementi's 7-11. Waited for ta and both her friends plus hamham to come down. Went to the standard coffee shop to drink, puked once today (: achievement! hahas. Andy ran from gh. Really Omgf, he gave me a scare. zzz... I'm a little tipsy. Having a headache now. Ham's court date is on the 10 of march, sub court. Hope that it'll get postpone.

Xiaoming, you'll be coming out next week. Its difficult not having you around. Right now i'm missing you more then ever. Please please be able to come out next week. All i want i for you to be able to come out and be right by my side. I love you.

6 of march. Saturday

Homeleave until Monday! :D

Went out with creston, byron, melvin, megan and crystal yesterday to Marina. It was fun going out with them. Took super lots of pictures. Caught " Percy Jackson ", i'm giving it a 5/5 as the show was the best thing ever! loved it (:
Met Wan, cutie and helene. That was the 1st time i went to Kent Ridge Park! Later on when Cutie had to sent her back so we went off. Went out to pick his bisnuess partners up.
Around 12am, i went down to meet rf, bi and jacky at clementi they decided to play lan and i was bored. After awhile Wan sent me home. At that point of time i was already quite tired wanted to take a rest but Cutie, ham and 2 other peepos came downstairs my house, so sadly i had to go down, accompanied them until 3plus then i went home. Was dead tired at that point of time so i fell asleep~!
27 of feb, saturday

Heyho!
HAPPY 15 MONTHS TO BOTH HUIMIN AND I!
I'm at jereemy's house with yanting right now. Gosh. They are disgusting, seriously. Its been such a long time sinced i've met jeremy and i'm glad i did. ( I know he misses me ) Both of them are hanky-pankying behind me now. Omgf. I'll leave them to themselve then. Would be meeting cutie, ham and helene later on. Guess we'll be rounding about. I'm bored!

Xiaoming's left with 2 more weeks. I just want to see him so badly. Though i had fun with my friends, but not being able to see him has left me feeling really uneasy. I know that he hates being inside but i can't do anything about it. I really do wish i could.. I just have to hope that time would quickly pass and i'll be able to communicate with him properly after 4 weeks of him being cooped up. I missed him so much, frigging much. Wished he was here by my side right now.

Xiaoming, if you're reading this now i want to say a simple, I Love You ~
28 of feb, sunday

Going back in about 10minutes or so, gonna pick ta up and then go back together.

Hope to see you,

Ciao~

Iloveyou(:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAMHAM ! Was the first to wish you. (:

I'm home, didn't blog for like a week? gosh. I'm really really tired. Came out at 11am, then waited for ta to get ready and then went to her house to fetch her to Esplanade and then met Nat there. Decided to go to Uncle Ringo, it was really fun! The rides made ta puked. I spent a total of $153 today! damn, i'm out of cash. Couldn't believe i spent sooo much. After that we went to Marina Square to shop, Nat bought and SK Jewllary necklace for yanting, we chipped in about $10 bucks each. Aww, his sweet! Met lt, th, pat and 2 other peeps which we don't know at Mac. Then Max wanted to meet up so he came down to find ta and I. Chitchatted and walked. Bought Creston at wallet for his birthday at Topman as he wanted one, hope he does like it. If not i'll be so disappointed! Then Wan ( being such a nice guy ) picked us up, ta wanted to go rounding so we went to Mount Faber, the view was just fabulous! And also there were fireworks, around 10pm he sent ta home, she was feeling well. So as Wan and I didn't have any specific place to go we went back to Clementi. Rf said that he and jacky would be there but by the time i went they wasn't around anymore. Sad huh? Cutie came down with a girl, I approved. Glad for him as she seems really nice. Waited for hamham too. Then cutie wanted to go to Mount Faber, Wan and I were like...AGAIN!! hahas. In the end we still went there. A little boring. I've been going there almost every weekend i'm out. Cutie's girl had to go back around 12, so we were somehow rushing for time. Luckily her mom didn't get angry. PHEWW! Sent ham home and then went back to clementi, cutie had to get his bike. I was quite tired already but then i wanted to go down to timah to meet rf, jacky and bi. Saw the girl who has hots for rf! Not bad, but 2 years older? Nah. And after i lil of 'touch and go' Wan sent me home around 1 plus. Got nagged by daddy ._.

xiaoming isn't come out for about 4 weeks.Though had fun this week it still didn't feel right. His inside and I'm outside. Guess his asleep right now, I missed him so much. Its so torturing not having him by my side, somehow weird.. 4 weeks of not being able to see him and really talk to him really does suck so much. His different from other people I've met, and thats why he is just so important to me. He makes me feel different, i wished his was by my side right now.

P.s xiaoming, do you have any idea how much I do miss you.

You could just make me angry in a second. Unpredictable isn't it.

Meeting yanting at town now, Ciao.

I can't bloody get to sleep. Damn.

Xiaoming, fell asleep and somehow, i just can't stop thinking about him. I didn't really get to talk to him for quite awhile, sinced last week. Guessed he is too tired thats why he fell asleep. I'm totally mood less. Can't fall asleep too, even though i'm tired. I just want to be able to feel that something between us, its straining and i'm starting to hurt. I want you so badly, but i ain't just gonna get you now eh? Things are so crazy, i am going crazy too. I'm lost, deep in the waves of paranoia. Give me assurance baby and i'll be yours.

P.s You are on my mind 24/7. Can you believe it?

Heyhey! updates; Creston was sick and didn't come to school. Awww, was lonely. But glad that his feeling much better now! Its gonna be CNY soon, and apparently i'm out!

I missed xiaoming, did a really nice thing for him. Hope he likes it then, if not i'll be superrr dissapointed~ Seriously. Nothing much to say also, gosh. I'm going be bored to death at home! I have to get out of the house. Should be going down to tamp tomorrow.

All i've got to say is Ciao, for now.

P.s Can't wait to lay eyes on you once again.

xiaoming, don't be like that okay? Just remember what i've said. Okay? You're the one i want and not others. I like you the way you are, and i want you to open up. Don't always keep everything to yourself, i know when you've got something on your mind but you aren't saying anything about it. Sometimes the things we say aern't really the things we mean.

I'm going to miss you like crazy when we both are inside, its gonna start sucking once again. Not being able to see you. How? I don't know what to do except for waiting to be able to come out! I'm left with afew more hours to be back at hellhole! crap. I am webcaming with xiaoming now!~ he can see me but i can't see him :( anw my boyfriend apparently seems to be kissing the computer right now! damn, he makes me jealous! You're gonna get a helload of kisses from me, boyfriend! You just mean so much to me!

P.s whenever i'm with you, i feel a surge of happiness.

let me update!

bathed and then got ready, daddy picked up ta at her house and then sent us to Bugis. Met yanting there. Decided to get new year clothes but didn't find anything to my liking, sad me :( Xiaoming came down around 3 plus with zhenwei, nic and jingshen. Weitian came down later. Surprisingly there were just so many gh peepos at bugis today! Saw huimin, patricia, peishan, trisha, della, sipei, leiting, jiaer, serli, joycelyn and clarence! Its crazy over there. Walk walked and then the guys wanted to play pool so we girls went to catch a really cute movie! Tooth fairy. It was hilarious, i'll give a 31/2 to 5 for it. After the movie we were all hungry so zw got the idea of going to eat steamboat. It was delicious and so my tummy was bloated. Each paid about 16bucks for the food, altogether it was like $96! whathehell! Its expensive. Xiaoming and i took bus 7 and you know what! We saw moon and her friend, such an coincidence can. Went to mac to get some " delicacies " and then started walking home. Lucky to have Xiaoming with me, he always sents me home! Gosh thats what i love about him, he is so darn adorable, and thats why he is my boyfriend! haha. I'm going to get sissy to get a tag board for me, i want one! Have to have an early night today, going to church tomorrow with family in the morning. Ciao.

P.s i love you!

My bestfriend, Creston.

Most girls go crazy over him, but i don't! hahahahas!

When i'm up, you are the first thing on my mind.

hello, came back yesterday. Then i decided to meet to meet cutie for awhile. Met him then waited for wan to come down. ( i am so gonna gag myself! ) His Kia koup is so frigging hot. We went down to vivo, then cutie parked his bikie there. We took wan's carcar to Mount Faber, to see the ohsoholy magnificent view. Dammit, its really romantic. I sooo want to go there again! we sat there for about and hour and a half or so, it was really a very good place to be if you've got loads of things on your mind, relieve them there. The 3 of us, romancing there. wee weet! After that cutie had to fetch his sister from work, and so i left my helmet with him. Wan brought me to some really posh place to eat roti prata's. I was craving for them, didn't eat dinner, actually wanted to diet. Lol. Thanks for sending me home, wan.
Supposedly was supposed to reach home at ten but then i stepped into the house around 11.15? Lucky daddy didn't scold me, and all the way xiaoming was sleeping. No wonder my hand phone wasn't vibrating :( At least he woked up awhile later, crapped with him until 1am? Then i fell asleep, couldn't take the long hours. Morever, i'm an early sleeper.
I'll be going down to bugis later. I'll blog later if i hve time.
Xiaoming, i missed you so much!

P.s. Xiaoming take note;

Kiss me once if you think of me
Kiss me twice if you miss me
Kiss me thrice if you really do love me!

ok, hi. This is going to sound weird, but yeah. My 1st blog is 2 years? ok cool. I have no idea how to set up a blog and thanks so sissy's help i somehow managed to. Let me start crapping about how miserable my life is. so dadadum, i'll be going back to gracehaven in like around (let me see) 16hours. I'm bored. I so envy those who have exceptionally really preety blogs so i've decided to set one up.
I miss xiaoming, its hard with him being inside and me outside. As the saying goes, " so near yet so far " that is so gonna explain how i'm feeling right now. Actually, i have got mixtures of feelings and that always clouds my judgement. For all i know, this place is for me to start crapping, hope it works though. Haven't been really free the past 2 days, didn't get to text xiaoming much. Guess when i'm about to sleep then i would sent him a cute lil goodnight text, have to make sure its a long one, or else...
Its 2.45am in the morning and i totally need a fag. Stressing about stuffs which dosen't seem to be much of a concern. I am depress. Totally. Sometimes i wish i could be free, free from reality's harsh times. Things are weird, people are even weirder. I don't get why to some people i am always labelled as a problematic child or some crap stuffs like that. Its so unfair! I didn't even get i bitty of chance to explain or voice out my opinions.
Why? Is it just because in society i am just somebody taken for granted? Gosh, can't seem to understand why life is like that. But anyway for now, i'll just assume that such things are way beyond the way, my brain can process them.
So, goodbye for now.

p.s you've been on my mind every single day, how could i not think of you?